Tony Blair is a man of many guises: international statesman, converted Catholic, war-mongering Crusader. Now you can add 'toilet roll authority' to that disparate list.

It was reported this week that Blair would pocket a cool £50,000 to speak for 40 minutes at the ISSA Worldwide Cleaning Industry Association ­conference in Florida, a swanky event for big nobs in the world of paper products and disinfectant that costs $1,000 a ticket.

Still, whether or not you're a fan of the man who invented, and then destroyed, New Labour, you can't deny Blair is a man of the people. Less so are Irish legislators who incurred the wrath of the masses for a bizarre (if well-intentioned) plan to help poor families beat the recession.

The government there has bought up 53 tonnes of Irish Cheddar, which it will be distributing for free via collection points in every town around the country.

While free cheese is always to be welcomed, you do rather wonder what the country's powerbrokers were thinking when they dreamt up the scheme. It sounds suspiciously like a plan Blogof came up with during its college years, after smoking what may, on reflection, not have been simply tobacco after all.

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