Good news for those of us who like their research trivial. Chocolate is good for your brain!

Regular consumption, according to the Maine-Syracuse Longitudinal Study, is linked with increased cognitive function. The boffins reckon throwing chocolate down your top hatch could help “protect against normal age-related cognitive decline”.

That’s all very well, but if it makes your brain function too well, it might realise chocolate is full of fat and sugar, and tell you to stop eating it! You just can’t win.