Good King (ex) Justin looked out

Seeking a successor

Someone not as good as me

So that I’ll look better

Bring me Coupe to run the show

For sales they have stopped climbing

Clearly knowing when to go

Is all about the ti-i-ming



God rest ye merry PR girls

Let nothing you dismay

There’s nothing that a glass of Krug

Won’t help to wash away

Forget about your clients’ needs

They’ll wait another day

O tidings of Champers and boys

Champers and boys

O tidings of Champers and boys



O come all suppliers

Joyless and despondent

Come with your chequebooks

Or just bring the cash

Give us your money

So we can keep on trading

We want to be your partners

We want to be your partners

We want to be your partners

While you’re still around



The Lidl and the Aldi

When they are both full grown (I think we’d better stop there)