Our biggest supermarket chains have spent all year boasting about their green initiatives - but it seems there's one month of the year when the desire to be seen as an eco-friendly retailer goes up the chimney.

Asda's post-Christmas press release proudly states the retailer sold enough greetings cards in December to stretch from London to Lapland - and back - four times.

Meanwhile, Tesco says it sold nearly enough wrapping paper to go around the circumference of the Earth - and 15 million individual crackers to boot.

So much for saving the rainforest.

And if all that wasn't bad enough, customers at the two stores purchased a combined 311 million Brussels sprouts. Now, what effect is all that excess gas going to have on the ozone layer?

There's only one thing for it if these retailers really want to be truly green. Their new year's resolution has to be to ban Christmas 2008 just to save the planet.

Sure, it'll mean a big dent in sales and profits. But what good will money be in a world laid to waste by a festive environmental disaster?

But if we do have to have Christmas this year, how about getting reindeers to power all those trucks?