Welcome to Ribena’s Colouring Cafe! Everyone here is given a tile to colour in - though they occasionally stop to play with fake moustaches and witter about how much they love sweet shops. Later, all the tiles are stuck on the wall to make a lovely mosaic. Lights are then projected on it, bringing the picture to life - and gasps from the crowd.

Yes, these little kids are adorably… um, hang on. These are fully grown adults! It gets more annoying: “There’s no rules,” chirps one woman, fundamentally misunderstanding the whole ‘staying between the lines’ thing. Also, they’re all drinking Ribena out of little jars, like 2013-era hipsters.

Even the slogan - ‘You can’t get any more Ribenary’ - is awful. Ribenary? No no no.