It's not entirely clear when or why massive cakes became as intrinsically linked with wedding-day magic as punch-ups, rambling speeches from drunken uncles and furtive fumbling between ushers and bridesmaids.

And why are there no cakes at funerals, when we could all do with a bit of sugary heartwarming and calorific cheering up?

Pie peddlers are now parking their pastry-topped tanks on the cake-makers' proverbial lawns, having spotted a gap in the market for carnivorous newlyweds as demonstrated by the impressive tiered pie, pictured above.

"Traditionally, pork pies have been seen as a man's preserve," admits Norfolk pie maker Sarah Pettegree.

(In that case, she might be better off targeting those civil partnerships where most guests are keen on the occasional injection of pork.)

"But we pride ourselves on being women who make pork pies that everyone, including women, enjoy eating and that can look every bit as attractive as a traditional cake."

Expect Quorn to bring out a vegetarian version for people who like the idea of getting married but think it's cruel to force people to spend the rest of their lives together.