The plans for growth announced yesterday by consumer goods giant Reckitt Benckiser meet with a warm reception in the Financial Times. No wonder chief executive Bart Becht is on a reported £24m pay package.

Elsewhere in the Mail, there’s the bizarre tale of the 59 year-old man that couldn’t buy cigarettes from Tesco because he had no ID.

And another cracking story – British riverbanks are being invaded by a species of Chinese crab. A species of edible Chinese crab.

Turns out some people really do miss Woolworths. The former manager of a Dorchester outlet has reopened the store undet the wildly imaginative new name of Wellworths.

And talking of closures, figures in the Daily Express show that an average of 39 pubs are shutting down every week.