As you'll know from the G33, Asda sure does like its promotions.

And there was an eye-catching deal on offer this week in its Netto plaything, with a press ad alerting readers to the chance to buy three bottles of wine for a tenner and a shiny new chainsaw for a similarly bargain-basement price.

Killjoys who question the wisdom of operating a potentially deadly bit of garden machinery after two litres of cheap plonk have clearly never experienced the simple joy of ­impromptu lumberjacking.