Q: One of my team is not performing; he's not achieving his targets, disappearing at the dot of 5.30pm and taking many private calls. I have asked him if there is anything wrong and he blithely tells me all is well. All is not well in my eyes so what's the next step?

A: At some stage there is a very stark choice to be made. Either he gets back to contributing to the business or if he continues to steal his salary, then he has to go. However the first step is for him to understand the consequences of his action. If he continues to bat your comments away, it's time to go for the jugular he has to be told that his job is on the line.

Too often I hear senior people getting themselves tied up in knots about how to approach poor performers. Perhaps if we weren't so signed up to the school of compassion our staff might have a better idea of what we want from them. He could have serious issues and as an adult and employee he has to explain what is going on. But short of the rack and water torture, if he decides not to divulge, you need to follow the disciplinary route to out him from the business.

Q: I am dreading the office Christmas party. I know I don't handle drink well so will only have one glass of wine and then move onto soft drinks but last year everyone got more and more abusive as they became increasingly inebriated, and appeared to believe that it was their mission to force me to drink from telling me I was a party pooper to pouring vodka into my glass. My boss has insisted that he expects the whole team to be there to "enjoy themselves".

A: Forced jollity with work colleagues would strike many as a living hell, yet it has to be endured. You have to be there to prove you're a team player and if you call a "sickie" it will be too abundantly clear to your boss and colleagues that you are lying.

A few tips keep your one glass of wine going all night by never finishing it, as long as your glass looks half full it will be assumed that you are keeping up with the rest. This is not the time to waltz around with orange juice if you are not feeling strong enough to take the abuse. Chat and socialise with the more senior people, the chances are that they have this particular T-shirt and rather similar to you, are only there for appearances sake.

Try not to be the first to leave as you will be spotted but you will be amazed once one person has left, how many more will then leave quietly. Work out a subtle exit and with luck you won't be noticed.

If you have a question for Sue, email her at sue@mountstevensexecutivecoaching.com.

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