Nationality seems to be a touchy subject in the dairy world at the moment. But our It’s All Greek To Me campaign, launched on behalf of a group of patently non-Hellenic dairy companies, appears to be paying off. No longer does Greek yoghurt have to be strained through the bushy moustache of a native herdsman (I think that was the criterion), leaving our clients un-Feta’d (ha ha) when it comes to exploiting the few remaining assets of a nation on its knees and whipping out ranges that haven’t even been near north London, let alone Greece.

And now Anchor doesn’t come from New Zealand. I’m sure marketing amnesia could be a recognised condition, there’s so much of it about. How long since Arla spent millions telling us how important New Zealand grass is to Anchor?

Dairy nationalism won’t go away, though. Now the Isle of Wight is launching its own milk, which will presumably taste like milk did 25 years ago. I know the IoW isn’t technically a country, but after glamping at this year’s festival, I can vouch for it being another world.

Talking of moustaches (pay attention), can I advise anyone who was thinking of growing one this month to shave it off before the Christmas party. There are some things even PR girls won’t snog, even clients and even for charity. Persephone, our dim but rich intern, managed to stop herself asking Karoline (with a K) if she was supporting Movember just in time. Although she’s the otherwise unemployable daughter of a potential client, she wouldn’t get away with that.

Meanwhile Bright Foods seems to have taken a long while to swallow Weetabix. I thought you might like to insert your own punchline here.