Finding common ground with Karoline (with a K) is as rare as a smile at Tesco, but we both agree that the new Tunnock’s Caramel Wafer ad is shockingly bad. K suggests the deeply annoying Scottish child may possibly be a young Nicola Sturgeon, because the ad looks as though it was made 50 years ago when she would have been young but just as horrible, and before things like humour and production values were invented.

Devoid of wit, charm or much in the way of a product benefit (apparently a Tunnock’s takes a while to chew, but then so does carpet) it offers hope for anyone who has ever thought that making TV ads must be easy. Clearly some clients are willing to let you have a go, whatever the results.

Apart from this brief moment of harmony, K has been behaving as strangely as ever, and is now regularly entertaining bearded men (alas, not hipsters) to earnest and animated conversations in her office (door locked and blinds down). She maintains that she met them at IFE and is planning a generic initiative to promote dates. Nobody believes this and the rumour mill is in full flow. Persephone thinks she’s going to set up an office in Dubai and has already researched ex-pat shopping opportunities.

It’s enough to drive you to drink which, once again and just in time for the Bank Holiday, science has proven is a good thing. Researchers at the University of Bristol have found that drinking alcohol in moderation can make you more attractive to the opposite sex. I intend to extrapolate this later to the point where I am simply irresistible (though possibly also unintelligible). See you at the Hospital (Club, not A&E).