A worrying trend is sweeping the nation and it’s set to get much worse as Christmas approaches. I don’t know quite when it happened, but in the last couple of years it’s become socially acceptable to serve prosecco. Apparently much of Majestic’s £9.5m half-year profit hinges on this appalling development. I suspect the evil hand of PR at work. In fact, I think I know which agency runs the Prosecco Promotion Board. Chavs, to a woman. Their slogans - ‘not as bad as you thought’ and ‘it gets better after the first bottle’ - have clearly hit the spot with impoverished funsters who have no money and less taste.
So let it be known, as the festive season approaches, that when P&F takes clients out to celebrate there will be none of this skinflint behaviour. We will treat them with the respect and importance they think they deserve. Only the finest grande marque bubbles will be served. The fact that it will be recharged to them with a 17.65% mark up is neither here nor there. Style and taste must triumph.
Unlike at The Co-op, which has neither, thanks to a dour socialist ethos that promotes the view that the misery of shopping should be shared equally via its fun-free stores. If only the food business shared the carefree attitude apparently adopted by former chair of the banking arm, Paul Flowers - and also commonplace at top PR agencies. (I wish. Karoline (with a K) doesn’t seem to share the progressive views on work/life balance of the Methodists.)
Anyway, Midlands and Anglia Co-ops are set to merge and are looking for a new name. We suggest Manglia, which seems to sum up the state of the entire movement at the moment.