I'm not sure if this bodes well but The Grocer seems to have a glowing reputation among the unemployed. A youthful gentleman called my colleague this week wanting to know if we had any experts on the low-calorie sweetener market. No, he wasn't from the BBC, CNN or The Guardian. Instead he was urgently preparing for a job interview later that day and wanted to know if we had any experts who could brief him on the subject, as it was crucial to his chances of success. Alas, we didn't.

Glad to see that the Competition Commission is taking its investigation into the grocery market seriously. So seriously, in fact, that it has decided it might be useful to get a better picture of the industry and keep up with any news. Hence the call this week to our senior reporter Rod Addy. "I think we ought to be taking out a subscription to The Grocer," said the CC official. Yes, that might be helpful.

In advance of next week's free Dairymen supplement in The Grocer, I hear that farmers from organic milk brand Calon Wen have launched a cow aversion therapy course to help people who are bovine phobic - afraid of cows. Apparently cow phobia prevents many people from hiking, biking, visiting or even living in the countryside. Says farmer Geraint George: "We love our cows and intend to show others how gentle and unscary they are." His advice: Move around cattle quietly, never pass between a cow and its calf and, in the "unlikely" event that cows chase you and your dog, let your dog off the lead - don't risk getting hurt in order to protect it. Erm, thanks for that, now I'm even more afraid.

Thanks to Tesco for telling us that car steering wheels may carry twice as many germs as toilet seats, yet only 13% of people clean their cars regularly. "People are in constant contact with the wheel, so naturally germs are passed on, " says Tesco car care buyer Daniel Kyle. Another reason, then, to ditch the car and take public transport instead.

bogofs.week@william-reed.co.uk