Heston Blumenthal rarely lets us down when it comes to ‘eccentric’ food. But even devotees who’ve cheerfully swallowed his snail porridge, worm pizza and human liver pasties (we made one of those up - guess) might be disconcerted by his latest inspiration: feminine hygiene.
Fortunately, the mad Fat Ducker - who also this week constructed a 3m-high 99 cone in a misguided attempt to save the ice cream van, as you do - isn’t putting Tampax tapas on the menu. Rather he’s been ‘experimenting’ with shoving tampons (unused) into his cakehole. They are, he insists, the perfect palate cleanser.
Heston says his restaurant customers won’t be getting them between courses, but surely this represents an open goal for Waitrose. A simple aisle reshuffle and… ta-dah! Double the target market for tampons. You can have that one for free, guys.