There’s a lot to be said for only telling half a story (the positive half of course, duh), though maybe not when your name’s George Osborne.

Incidentally, I’ve had stern words with Daddy following his appearance on the Cameron menu of shame about squandering my inheritance. (And he could at least have held out for Chequers.) You see, £250K would buy a lot of stabling and saddle soap and I’m not sure spending it on dinner with Tory boy is a wise investment.

He maintains, though, that the forthcoming bonfire of red tape will now include sweeping away “unnecessary regulation” on things like “oh, toxicity levels and suchlike”, bringing windfalls for companies that trade in food ingredients from China, some of which Daddy’s do.

Even with the world of spin in hyperdrive, the news this week that chocolate helps keep you thin was a bit of a surprise. But what Karoline (with a K) and other big boned Captain(ette)s of the PR industry haven’t grasped is that it doesn’t make you thin in the first place. Such are the subtle distinctions on which PR campaigns are built. And, coincidentally, just in time for Easter!

In a weak, possibly chocolate-addled moment, K agreed to make up any shortfall in our wages resulting from minimum alcohol pricing. I’m trying to get my average consumption up to an all-time high to make the most of this.

I deffo couldn’t have been sober when I agreed to work on our new account promoting GM animal feed. The real brief is a kind of two-fingered ‘sod you and your principles’ to consumers now non-GM is too expensive. Our campaign half-message, however, is that science still hasn’t found anything wrong with GM. (Yet.)