Here are the facts: Unless you reject delicious things like butter, sugar, chocolate and gin, and force down at least five bits of fruit or vegetable a day, you risk missing out on the ultimate prize - a place in a care home!
Have you ever been in one of those places? They are not great adverts for carrots. Fortunately, not everyone is on the same page as the Department of health, hence the launch of Sweets Made Simple (BBC2, 8 August, 8.30pm), a new show that promises to demystify the alchemy of confectionery, presented by two eccentric experts in the field, Kitty Hope and Mark Greenwood.
Obviously, there are TV shows focused on puddings and cakes already, and production lessons have clearly been learned from The Great British Bake Off. There is plenty of hazy, lazy camerawork that lingers up close on the food, a jaunty soundtrack, pastel shades everywhere, and very British characters sprinkled throughout. Yet where GBBO delights in presenting its bakers with daunting and technically advanced challenges, this show promised to keep it simple. And the first recipe was as simple as it gets.
Take a great big block of butter, melt it with a heap of good old white sugar to make unctuous toffee, mix in a whole load of toasted almonds, top with melting milk chocolate, then leave it on the side to cool. Then break it into pieces.
It was easy to make. It was gorgeous to look at. Then they made salted caramel chocolates. After that they made chocolate truffles infused with gin. And yes, nothing they made was guaranteed to help prolong your life. But all of it looked guaranteed to help you enjoy it.