I'm going to start this week with a bit of a rant ­ and why not, it's my column. Why is it that the switchboards of so many big companies (mostly American owned companies, it has to be said) are refusing to give out job titles, confirm name spellings or even admit somebody works for them? I have noticed this strangely irritating habit when calling this small but growing band of paranoid companies. One switchboard denied it had a press office last week ­ even though I had just spoken to its communications director. There's a big philosophical question here: are these soft drinks salesmen and crisp manufacturers afraid they are on some sort of hit list for anti-junk food campaigners? Or are they embarrassed by what they do? If you work for one of these companies I would love to hear the reasons for this absurd culture of secrecy. If I was a customer and received that sort of welcome from a switchboard I know how I would react the next time a rep appeared in my shop trying to flog me salty snacks, and it ends in "off". On another note, I was disappointed I couldn't take any snaps at last week's launch of the Frozen at Sea Fillets Association, held at the Fishmongers Hall in London. Turns out that copyright rules still apply to a £4m portrait of the Queen hanging in the main presentation room. And finally­ spare a little pity, if you can, for the Sunday tabloid woman hack who flew all the way to the Maldives to talk to Iceland boss Malcolm Walker only to receive a "no comment". Wonder who signs off her expenses? {{COUNTERPOINT }}