F is for fun. Often you buy something on impulse because you like it and it feels good. O is for obligation. Someone has done something for us - often a favour - and we feel duty-bound to respond to his or her request. We feel obliged.
R is for running away. I was canoeing in the Canadian Rockies with my eldest and the leader in the six-man Canadian Canoe learned I was a motivational speaker. He waited his moment, unbeknown to me, and then said: "See that sign over there?" There was a huge sign reading, 'Waterfall 1 kilometre. Please leave the river at the next bank.' Certain death awaited anyone who attempted to go over it in a canoe. He said: "The current's strong and we all gotta paddle hard to make sure we make the bank on the right." We all paddled like never before. He tapped me on the shoulder and shouted above the din of the fast-running water: "That's motivation!" He motivated us by letting us see what was in it for us. And that's the difference between motivation and manipulation. People are motivated to do what they want to do. But sometimes you need to point out the issues so they see why they should act. Manipulation is when you get someone to do something by conning them. It can work in the short term, but never in the long term. You reap what you sow.
And M, of course, is for money. It is a motivator, but it's rarely the key one. For many employees money is a 'hygiene' factor. If they are being rewarded in line with their expectations, then the real motivation is usually more about a feeling of self-worth and appreciation.
And that's the key to motivation. Find out what people want to do and what is important to them. Then work out together how they can do it in a way that matches your motivation.
Philip Hesketh is a professional speaker on 'The Psychology of Persuasion' and author of 'Life's A Game So Fix The Odds'