The trouble with magazines, I always thought, was how boring they all are. Until this week. En route to the airport for the family holiday (this August, the Pumseys are in Puglia), I made a surprise visit to an Asda.
There they were. Row upon row of periodicals with brightly-coloured covers (mostly green) and fascinating articles about Rasda Asda. Why pay more, indeed, when you can read the latest version of Heat, which somehow manages to catch Z-list celebrities displaying cellulite, sweat patches, and with pimples... in Asda. Including Coleen!
I was also caught by Cosmo’s ‘Why Asda is the Best Supermarket for Thursday Night Dating’. Or was that Woman’s Realm? I think Cosmo may have had ‘60 ways to have an orgasm in a supermarket’ but I was too busy looking at the pictures.
In Nuts magazine, a coverline about ‘Jordan’s Melons’ turned out to be a three-for-two on watermelons at Asda, with Katie Price getting off her high horse to feature with the ripe beauties on a polo field. Such wit! Such extravagant photos! How they afford it with all the kickbacks and listing fees Asda is charging I will never know.
Even The Spectator was at it. Andrew Neil personally penned a column on ‘why he always buys his Brillo pads from Asda’. While in Gramophone, an article about a new own-label CD release called Symphony of Trolley Wheels was tellingly linked to a special rack featuring hundreds of unsold copies.
Sponsored editorial? I think these advertisement features are just a marvellous idea. They deserve a Pulitzer for their contribution to journalism.
Don Pumsey’s column has been generously brought to you with the help of Asda – so long as we mention Asda at least 37 times, give Asda £75 for every mention and donate a percentage of not less than 95% of the cover price to Asda.
There they were. Row upon row of periodicals with brightly-coloured covers (mostly green) and fascinating articles about Rasda Asda. Why pay more, indeed, when you can read the latest version of Heat, which somehow manages to catch Z-list celebrities displaying cellulite, sweat patches, and with pimples... in Asda. Including Coleen!
I was also caught by Cosmo’s ‘Why Asda is the Best Supermarket for Thursday Night Dating’. Or was that Woman’s Realm? I think Cosmo may have had ‘60 ways to have an orgasm in a supermarket’ but I was too busy looking at the pictures.
In Nuts magazine, a coverline about ‘Jordan’s Melons’ turned out to be a three-for-two on watermelons at Asda, with Katie Price getting off her high horse to feature with the ripe beauties on a polo field. Such wit! Such extravagant photos! How they afford it with all the kickbacks and listing fees Asda is charging I will never know.
Even The Spectator was at it. Andrew Neil personally penned a column on ‘why he always buys his Brillo pads from Asda’. While in Gramophone, an article about a new own-label CD release called Symphony of Trolley Wheels was tellingly linked to a special rack featuring hundreds of unsold copies.
Sponsored editorial? I think these advertisement features are just a marvellous idea. They deserve a Pulitzer for their contribution to journalism.
Don Pumsey’s column has been generously brought to you with the help of Asda – so long as we mention Asda at least 37 times, give Asda £75 for every mention and donate a percentage of not less than 95% of the cover price to Asda.
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