Ooooo Mikey! ‘Lil’ Deuce’ Coupe (pictured) has certainly fired up his hot rod this time and isn’t it lovely that the Old Boys of Asda and Saino’s have finally come together to ward off the Huns and the Amazonians!
It’s rather sweet that the CEO of Sainsbury’s (who used to be at Asda) can call up his old buddy the CEO of Asda (who used to be at Sainsbury’s) and say ‘Rog, it’s time we got the band back together’. He’s even been practising his vocals ahead of the reunion.
Drastic Dave will be hopping mad too now he’s no longer top dog and may even say ‘oh bother’ or whatever it is he does when he’s all fired up, but all that’s of no concern to me, readers!
I’m into this job almost a month now and between you and me a bit bored of footling around with piffling stuff like Brexit, so this will all be lovely. Fishlips Gove has already been on the blower - for a moment I thought I was going to get reassigned to the Home Sec gig and I was applying some power lippie for the interviews. But this is better.
I’m to be at the very forefront of his probe and the Rog and Mike show had better watch it! Dear Uncle Don brought me in as an intern last time they took the dust sheets off the CMA so I know how these things are done, from the blank cheques to the lawyers to the PR bamboozling of all those dimwitted retail hacks.
So fear not, I shall be there, staunchly defending both consumers and suppliers, however that works, darlings. And the Tesco-bash of ’07 has given me some great arguments against the power of supermarket monoliths, taken verbatim from - you guessed it - Sainsbury’s and Asda! Toodeloo!
Donna Pumsey, aka Ms Frexit, is our one-woman troubleshooter at the Department of Food Retail Exports Imports and Trade. You can follow her at @MsFrexit. Just not too closely.