Imagine a lady forthright, imposing, statuesque, made up to the nines, booming voice and brooking no argument and you have the identikit PR diva traditionally at the helm of the UK’s PR agencies.

In previous lives she would have been slaying dragons and seducing men by sheer force of personality. Puff & Fluff is no exception. We have our Boadicea/Brunhilda in Karoline (with a K).

She is not, as regular readers will know, a woman who reacts well to scorn. To this end, there is a list that you don’t want to be on. Whether witchcraft is actually involved in getting even is difficult to say, but I wouldn’t be at all surprised.

Take Phil Woolas, former political high flier and man of the people. Looks like your younger sister’s first boyfriend (over-confident and slightly shifty). He upset Karoline terribly two years ago by talking common sense about bottled water’s pioneering role in the destruction of the environment. At the time we were working for Splosh the Bottled Water Promotion Board and they fired us for not foreseeing this calamity. In the fullness of time, as we knew it would, the curse of K has wreaked its revenge and Woolas is now dissolving before our eyes.

As are Innocent’s hopes, I see, of getting a break on VAT. According to HMRC rules, you’re a beverage and liable to VAT if you “give pleasure”, as their glutinous fruit slops do to some people. Of course, if pleasure is the criterion, the reason why soya milk was made VAT exempt a couple of years ago suddenly becomes clear.

Finishing on a fashion note, Kurt Geiger sales are booming thanks to the popularity of its ‘killer’ 120mm heel stilettos. Wearing heels like that can get a girl a reputation. They really should be Christian Louboutin.

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